Hate Your Parents?

January 11, 2026

“Hate Your Parents?” Pastor David Moore

Joshua 24:1-18 (NIV)  

1 Then Joshua assembled all the tribes of Israel at Shechem.  He summoned the elders, leaders, judges and officials of Israel, and they presented themselves before God.

2 Joshua said to all the people, “This is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says: ‘Long ago your forefathers, including Terah the father of Abraham and Nahor, lived beyond the River and worshiped other gods.  3 But I took your father Abraham from the land beyond the River and led him throughout Canaan and gave him many descendants.  I gave him Isaac, 4 and to Isaac I gave Jacob and Esau.  I assigned the hill country of Seir to Esau, but Jacob and his sons went down to Egypt.

5 “‘Then I sent Moses and Aaron, and I afflicted the Egyptians by what I did there, and I brought you out.  6 When I brought your fathers out of Egypt, you came to the sea, and the Egyptians pursued them with chariots and horsemen as far as the Red Sea.  7 But they cried to the Lord for help, and he put darkness between you and the Egyptians; he brought the sea over them and covered them.  You saw with your own eyes what I did to the Egyptians.  Then you lived in the desert for a long time.

8 “‘I brought you to the land of the Amorites who lived east of the Jordan.  They fought against you, but I gave them into your hands.  I destroyed them from before you, and you took possession of their land.  9 When Balak son of Zippor, the king of Moab, prepared to fight against Israel, he sent for Balaam son of Beor to put a curse on you.  10 But I would not listen to Balaam, so he blessed you again and again, and I delivered you out of his hand.

11 “‘Then you crossed the Jordan and came to Jericho.  The citizens of Jericho fought against you, as did also the Amorites, Perizzites, Canaanites, Hittites, Girgashites, Hivites and Jebusites, but I gave them into your hands.  12 I sent the hornet ahead of you, which drove them out before you—also the two Amorite kings.  You did not do it with your own sword and bow.  13 So I gave you a land on which you did not toil and cities you did not build; and you live in them and eat from vineyards and olive groves that you did not plant.’

14 “Now fear the Lord and serve him with all faithfulness.  Throw away the gods your ancestors worshiped beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the Lord.  15 But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living.  But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

16 Then the people answered, “Far be it from us to forsake the Lord to serve other gods!  17 It was the Lord our God himself who brought us and our fathers up out of Egypt, from that land of slavery, and performed those great signs before our eyes.  He protected us on our entire journey and among all the nations through which we traveled.  18 And the Lord drove out before us all the nations, including the Amorites, who lived in the land.  We too will serve the Lord, because he is our God.”

 

This period follows Christmas and before Lent.  I want to explore quotes from Jesus that seem out of character from Him.

 

Luke 14:25-27 (NIV)

25 Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: 26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple.  27 And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.”

 

This passage is about discipleship.  It’s about priorities, it’s about what it means to follow Jesus, to be His disciple.

 

Discipleship is not an option.  When you invite Jesus into your heart, to rule your life, there is no level of commitment to Jesus, there is just one standard for everyone.  You are either in or out.

 

Discipleship isn’t a program or an event; it’s a way of life.  It’s not for a limited time, but for our whole life.  Discipleship isn’t for beginners alone; it’s for all believers for every day of their life.  Discipleship isn’t just one of the things the church does; it is what the church does.  ~Bill Hull

 

We are asked to pick up our cross daily and follow Jesus.

 

Anyone who would follow Jesus as their Lord and savior must have Him as exactly that, Lord, Master.  No one comes before Him in their lives.  Jesus has to be first, ahead of friends, family, career, hobbies, anything.  Complete and sacrificial discipleship is the only way to relate to Jesus.  To follow Jesus is to be a disciple, full stop.  This is how we appreciate the cost to follow Jesus.  Jesus is up front about the actual cost of discipleship.

 

You are to come to me (Jesus) because I am who I said I was, I am the way, the truth and the life, come to me because I’m God, and want to be your Lord, but I won’t force you.  If you come through, know that not everything will happen the way you think it should.

 

Psalm 89:7  God is not safe, but He is good.

 

Jesus is saying here that He (God) is good, but not safe.  Safety seems to not be a priority for God.

 

Our lives are meant to glorify God, whatever that looks like.

 

“God’s plan for your life is not meant to be compared to His plan for anyone else.  Who God has called you to be is unique.  How God is molding you into that person in intentional.”

 

We are to attempt to accomplish what He (God) has asked us to do, to the very best of our ability.  Which means modifying or changing our plans for our life.

 

Our life isn’t fully ours anymore, because of our commitment to Christ.  We have given our life to Jesus.  He gives that life back to us with tasks attached that will grow His Kingdom, that will reach and bless new folks.

 

In this passage, Jesus is using a Semitic way of using the word ‘hate’ to not mean hate actively, but to hate comparatively.  Genesis 29: Jacob who has two wives, is an example of comparatively hatred of Rachel and Leah.

 

Jesus wants us to love Him more than anything else.  Jesus is bringing all the different kinds of human love together to offer a kind of love that makes all other sorts of love pale in comparison.

 

We are to love Jesus, prioritize Jesus above all other things in this world.

 

If you love Jesus, you will talk to Him, you will get to know him better, you will attempt to serve Him.

 

Jesus wants us to love Him, not to the exclusion of all other loves, not to love only Him, but to love Him in such a way that our other loves – parent, children, spouse, friends – that our relationships are impacted by the way we love Jesus.  This love and grace we get from Jesus flows into the ways we interact with all the other people in our lives. 

 

I find this to be a searching love.  Paul talks about this in Romans 5:3-5, “we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.”

 

Those verses in Romans should cause us to examine ourselves.

 

It’s about our prayer life.  It’s about the love of God in our life.  It is centered around loving God.

 

Saint Augustine said that the key to a transformed character, to a great life, to forgiveness and courage and peace is not willpower, but a proper ordering of life.  He said sin is a disordered love, but when we have our lives properly ordered, then we function as God created us to properly function.

 

How do we get the peace we want, the freedom we want, the order we need?  We need to love God more.  The love of Jesus will change us.

 

How does this come about?  Pray more, take up the cross and follow Jesus.  We are to put ourselves in Jesus’ place, to realize the fact that when Jesus died on the Cross, we did too.

 

Colossians 3 “…set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God… for you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.”

 

Our lives are hidden in Christ.  So, when God looks at us, He sees what Jesus did on our behalf.

 

Luke 9:23  Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.

 

We are to live a sacrificial life like Jesus, we are also to live in the grace of knowing what Jesus voluntarily did for us, and to take up our cross.

 

Religion says: God will love us if we change.  The Gospel says: God’s love changes us.

 

We follow because our life no longer belongs to us.  So, whatever comes, we are still carrying that cross.  The cross doesn’t guarantee an easy life.  We are called to a life following Jesus.

 

Discipleship is a gradual process.  Jesus is patient with us as we grow each day, following Him with our cross.  God bless you.  Pray that the Holy Spirit would help you to know in your heart the love of our healing Father.